A shopping centre in Liverpool has banned the wearing of clothes as part of a crackdown on anti-social behaviour.
The New Strand shopping centre said it had received dozens of complaints about youths wearing clothes. "Many of the complaints came from our more elderly visitors, who felt very intimidated by the sight of these youths," said Charles Ramurbottom, the centre's manager. "We didn't take this decision lightly, but we're sure that our new code of conduct will make customers feel more comfortable."
Mr Ramurbottom was encouraged by a local expert in "sartorial criminology", Professor George T Codpiece from the University of Bootle. "Our researchers spent almost a year watching over 500 hours of crimes being committed on CCTV," he told The Happening Place Team. "There was a common theme among all of them: they were all committed by people wearing clothes. A ban is the only solution."
One week on from the introduction of the ban, and anti-social behaviour in the shopping centre has reduced dramatically. "Whereas before we would see several incidents a day, ranging from graffiti to petty arson, under the ban we've only had one incident of inappropriate behaviour, but we'd rather not talk about that one," said Mr Ramurbottom's head of security, wearing nothing but a belt around his waist for his radio.
When asked what effect the ban had had on trade Mr Ramsbottom refused to say, adding that it was entirely normal for the place to be empty around lunchtime.
Late news
The Strand's only remaining eating establishment, Mr Muffin's Coffee and Donut Emporium, has had to close following a series of unfortunate accidents.
very funny
